Starting with WHY should be the focus. It’s not easy, nor is it natural. Starting each of our days, our weeks, or our years with the focus on WHY will allow us to stay closely united with the purpose of our journey in this world—WHY we are here. If WHY is our focus, a myriad of positive changes will be realized by ourselves and those around us. We will naturally start to become more passionate, clear and purposeful. Our intentions will become more deliberate. Congruence and authenticity will rise.
This is what is most noticeable and what I’ve realized happens in my life.
When I start with WHY others place trust in me, are genuinely interested in my WHY, and often want to be a part of the WHY. When this happens, it’s truly special and transformative—it marks the beginning of a team. Simon Sinek, author of Start with Why, puts it this way:
We can only provide a rational basis for a decision, when we can only point to tangible elements or rational measurements, the highest level of confidence we can give is, “I think this is the right decision.” When we make gut decisions, the highest level of confidence we can offer is, “The decision feels right,” even if it flies in the face of all the facts and figures. Again, this is biologically accurate, because gut decisions happen in the part of the brain that controls our emotions, not language.
Ask the most successful entrepreneurs and leaders what their secret is, and invariably they all say the same thing: “I trust my gut.” The times things went wrong, they will tell you, “I listened to what others were telling me, even though it didn’t feel right. I should have trusted my gut.” The ability to put a WHY into words provides the emotional context for decisions. It offers greater confidence than “I think it’s right.” It’s more scalable than “I feel it’s right.”
When you know your WHY, the highest level of confidence you can offer is, “I know it’s right.”
When you know the decision is right, not only does it feel right, but you can also rationalize it and easily put it into words. The decision is fully balanced. Sinek describes times when he would turn away business because a client didn’t “feel right.” Personally, I’ve done this several times. I will only work with clients that understand and buy into my team’s WHY. No longer will I take overpriced listings from demanding clients who think agents are commodities. When we focus in that way, we build trust.
Everything always comes back to trust—in business and in life.
“What do you focus on most often? What’s your life’s obsession? Finding love? Making a difference? Learning? Earning? Pleasing everyone? Avoiding pain? Changing the world? Are you aware of what you focus on most; your primary question in life? Whatever it is, it will shape, mold and direct your life.” —Tony Robbins, Money: Master the Game
The ability to put a WHY into words provides the emotional context for decisions.
Pay attention to how you feel when you interact with others and what that might say about your WHY.
What did you discover about your WHY as you monitored your feelings in your interactions today?